Popcorn Pulse 205: Arthur’s Phallus

Ok, look. You see that sword over there? Yeah, the one stuck in that rock? Go over there and give it a little tug and come right back for your free meat pie. Now, you’ll see some guys put on a whole show. They’ll flail and flop around, maybe grunt or yell while they’re doing it. They crowd laughs but I’m not throwing in anything else just because you get them riled up. Got it, little Arthur?

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Popcorn Pulse 204: Santa’s Covenant

It’s early September and we’re talking about movies. So that means we had to pick something fitting. Naturally this means we grabbed a Christmas movie from last year with Violent Night[2022]. Which stars the sheriff from Stranger Things. Sure he has a name but that’s how he’s stuck in our heads since he first appeared.

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Popcorn Pulse 203: Replicant March

Movie reviews, please come to the white courtesy phone. Movie reviews, please pickup. If you’re not going to use the white courtesy phone, please head over to the beige discourtesy phone and let the operator know. For all cancellations, please head to the green motherly guilt phone. You know, if you’re not too important and can remember to call.

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Popcorn Pulse 202: Size of Life

We heard everyone has gotten excited by the prospect of a toy based movie. We’re not sure why that’s working this time when Ouija happened and no one cared. That was clearly the best possible children’s toy to adapt. Anything less will fall short. Either way, we’re just thrilled that people are once again talking about Life-Size[2000].

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Popcorn Pulse 201: The Sun

Open the curtains, you basement dwelling cretins. You to, you normal people who get plenty of exposure to natural light. Not you, people who make AI morphs of random Twitch streamer girls to suit your fetish. You can stay there and maybe check the batteries in your carbon monoxide alarm. Because there’s a chance you’re suffering from poisoning. For everyone else, take in plenty of Sunshine[2007].

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Popcorn Pulse 200: Godfatha

Two hundred episodes all about movies. That deserves somethings kind of special. Or, as they say in the land of surfing and wanna-be actors, special. So we decided to sit down and do what is considered one of the top films of all time. Kangaroo Jack.

OK, no, we did The Godfather(1972). It’s got a laundry list of actors you know, some before they were big enough to become parodies of themselves. Brando putting in a legendary performance that looms over everyone. A stray cat, just being a stray cat in the hands of the titular Godfather. A horses head in the bed of a Hollywood producer. Something that should happen more often until the quality of movies turns back around and starts not sucking.

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Popcorn Pulse 199: Jet Girl is Hotter

Imagine it’s the late eighties or early nineties and you’re a movie producer. That director with daddy issues that looks kinda like he’s in the cure just made a mint by adapting a little comic called Batman. You thought it couldn’t work because you remember Adam West and the wacky utility belt. But that dude made it work. So you scramble around looking for cheap rights to some of them comics the kids are clamoring for but you don’t want to spend all your coke money. So you pay pennies on the dollar for Tank Girl(1995).

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Popcorn Pulse 198: All Things Now

Oscar season has come and gone and left us with little to talk about. That’s because we don’t care about the awards because we’re not professionals. At least that’s our excuse. Still, one film dared us to talk about it with all the sappy reunion stories leaking like yogurt out of that hooker we paid in two thousand seven. We have Everything Everywhere All at Once[2022].

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Popcorn Pulse 197: Quiet Rain

With Weltall’s impending trip to the land of the rising sun which illuminates the tentacle porn, we figured a movie about Japan would be just right. It’s from the eighties if that helps and isn’t a comedy. It’s also not weekend at Bernie’s though that’s been requested over seven hundred times. We figure that’s an outlier from a rabid Terry Kiser fan. If you’re reading this, Gerald, we’ll get to it if and when we choose.

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