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Weltall and Tim, once again, can never seem to agree on the varying pronunciation of the term for comics depending on the source. There may be an official and sanctioned way to pronounce the subtle differences between manga, manhwa, and manhua but looking them up would take something akin to effort. Even if they wanted to, you’ve come to expect far less and we can’t break with tradition now.

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Bibliophiles don’t usually make the list of top candidates for most exciting job. We’re pretty sure that they’re ranked just below the people who muck out the stables for for Mel Gibson. Which means we must have a movie centered on just that. The Ninth Gate 1999, staring Johnny Depp before he started mistaking hat and makeup for acting.

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We’ve managed to barricade ourselves in the lower levers. The main gate failed early on though the gamer geeks took heavy casualties to get it done. The slings of the TV and comic nerds took down our archers. We’re low on arrows and hoping for reinforcements from Animu-land. I would like to believe we can hold it to then but I can hear the drums of the theater kids. They’re singing an acapella version of an incredibly popular song from five years ago. I fear they will press us far too soon.

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Bob Ross always like to say there are no such things as mistakes. Only happy accidents. This is pretty easy to say when you paint for a living in a studio without anyone to backsass you. For those of us living in the twenty first century with access to multiple forms of instant communication, this compounds things and makes mistakes impossible to avoid.

Which is how Weltall and Tim both ended up reviewing the same manhwa, Terror Man. We kick off with our protagonist sitting in class getting challenged by a classmate to rock paper scissors. He never loses because he has “eyes of misfortune” that turn the wrong choice into purple. This also allows him to cheat at tests.

Luckily the author knows we’re not interested in seeing this develop into some love triangle at school because a transfer student shows up and is purple. He goes to the mall with his dad’s live in maid. She’s from Russia and loves pressing her large breasts into his face to tease him. When he tells her he sees the building is purple and figures it will collapse, she asks him how they should evacuate people.

They, reasonably, come to the conclusion that no one will believe the place will collapse without evidence. Instead of pulling the fire alarm, she calls a friend to bring over guns so they can spook everyone out by pretending to be terrorists. Yes, that is a much better plan than calling in a bomb threat.

Tim read ahead a bit further than Weltall and found this appears to be the start of a theme where the protagonist runs into a disaster and decides to dress up as a terrorist to save people. It manages to land firmly in Read It Now territory.

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Deep in the heart of the South American mountains there is a place, hidden among the peaks. There, artisans follow the craft of their ancestors, working with techniques that have remained unchanged for generations. All to make garbage that’s easily inferior to tools purchased at any big box store. Proving traditions can be stupid.

Tim reviews Prison School. The premise starts off simply enough. A school formerly restricted to girls only has decided to coed. How could this go wrong in a manga? Five guys decide to try and sneak a peek at the girls bath and get caught. The student council decides to punish them by placing them in prison uniforms and in a small prison on school grounds. It’s optional for the boys but if they don’t decide to participate, they’ll be expelled. It gets a Read It Now.

Weltall’s Hunter Age changes things up by being a full color comic. The first two chapters begin setting up a tragedy which befalls the kingdom. Then we flash forward sixteen years, just long enough for one of the protagonists to grow up and be clueless about it. When a prince has to escape assassins and plows directly into protagonist, the adventure begins. It gets a Crackers.

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There was a time where Sam Elliott wasn’t the glorious be-mustached man that he’s been since cowboy films were invented. It wasn’t only two seconds after passing through the birthing canal, into the world, and then ordering a whiskey with a side of broken glass. Are word needn’t suffice for it has been well documented in movie form.

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You know what makes our shows and weddings better? Yes, money and professionalism. The answer we were looking for was themes. I’m sorry but no points for any of you. Also all answers must be in the form of an email to the hosts. While we prepare the next round, please enjoy the following messages from our sponsors.

With the theme of monster catching, Tim has Pokemon Adventures. The manga made to tie into the success of the original red and blue games. As such the protagonist is named Red and has rivalry with Blue. In the tradition of all adaptations of games, the rules of the game are ignored for the sake of making a plot favoring particular pokemon. Take for example the arc where Red uses a Pikachu to beat an Onix. It still gets a Borders.

Weltall then cracks open Yo-kai Watch. Nate Adams is a normal manga kid who’s parents are busy drinking and playing pachinko. He walks face first into the state’s program to curb population control by sending kids on deadly adventures when he cracks open a gashapon that has a watch and a yokai in it. He then starts seeing yokai, talking them out of being pests and gaining the ability to summon them to pester others. It lands on a Borders in a surprise to us.

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Turn down the lights, pour a glass of moonshine, and join us for another installment of requested manga theater. Wherein our free will is taken away and we’re forced to read things sent to us. To cope, we will undoubtedly be tapping into something delicious or at least highly alcoholic. Just as long as we don’t start dipping into mixed drinks.

Tim reviews Platinum End. A manga brought to us by the same people who gave us Death Note. We start off with our main character deciding it’s time to kill himself, climbing to the roof of a skyscraper, then taking an asphalt swan dive. He gets saved feet before death by an angel. She offers him the ability to tavel anywhere on earth nearly instantly or to fire arrows that make people love him. He says he’ll consider not dying if she gives him both. Turns out he’s one of twelve people who have guardian angels who are playing last man standing with the winner getting to take the place of god. It squeaks into a Crackers and will be worth a follow up.

Weltall then reviews Umineko: When They Cry. It’s set on the eighties where the Ushiromiya family gets summoned to the island they own. There’s a legend that grandpa Ushiromiya got the seeds of their fortune by making a deal with a witch. But if he doesn’t pay her back by a particular time and date, she’ll exact a price from the family. There’s excellent pacing and well assembled pacing that erans it a solid Read It Now

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Like an expensive sweater gifted to a nephew, we’ve returned quicker than anticipated. It’s another week, another drink and another manga. This time some self selected materials as we’ve got a few requests coming down the pipeline in the form of physical copies.

Tim reviews Marry Grave. It has a lighthearted style reminiscent of late nineties comedy manga. Our protagonist lives in a world that’s been invaded by goblins. He carries a coffin and is doing a world wide scavenger hunt attempting to raise his wife from the dead. There’s an interesting twist where we find out he died on his wedding night and his wife spent the rest of her life doing the same to resurrect him. It gets a Read it Now for being inventive and interesting.

Weltall reviews To Your Eternity. It begins with an alien lifeform landing on earth and copying a dying wolf. After taking it’s form, it wanders into an empty encampment where it finds a lone boy who’s been living along for a few years. It follows him along until he dies and takes his form. It’s very well paced and the story get more interesting from that point on, ending one a hilarious note made funnier by the serious tone thus far. It comfortably earns a Read it Now