Author: Weltall

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If there’s one thing that needed to be made, it was a sequel to Highlander. Unfortunately what we got was The Quickening. Much as the only way to get the bad taste of a chocolate out of your mouth is to eat seven more, so did we get inundated with sequels.

We visit with the fifth of them in, Highlander The Source[2007] under the hypothesis that the even numbered ones will always be garbage. While this is probably true, the odd numbered ones are just as incoherent. Featuring random blob immortals, the guy who played Duncan McCloud and a host of plotless destiny mumbly jumbly.

Weltall then talks about Hell or High Water[2016]. A movie in which the aptly named Chris Pine woodenly pretend to be bothered by the fact that the family ranch is going to be taken over by the bank. Sure he’s playing opposite Ben Foster but Pine manages to resemble a piece of furniture that it turns into Clint Eastwood having a conversation with an empty chair. So they rob banks to pay for the land, somehow.

Tim then talks about What We Do in the Shadows[2014]. In it, vampires are real and being filmed by a documentary crew for some reason, as it goes in these style of films. The group ends up getting dragged into the twenty first century by the friend of their newest member who installs the internet for them. Along the journey to modernization they meet werewolves, zombies and revenants. There’s really not much to say about other than it expertly performs as a mockumentary.

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The whole internet is talking about it. It’s the big budget movie that has ignited thousands of pointless think pieces on the internet. No other recent movie has been surrounded by such controversy as Pitch Perfect 3. Or it could be Star Wars The Last Jedi.

We have quite a bit to say about the thing. Tim complains about the bombers they use in place of the canonical Y-Wings. Wetall, and the greater internet, complains about arcing lasers in space. Weird sub plots, bad characterization, and tension killing jokes abound. Though if you’re anything like our live listener Algazero, skip to the forty two minute mark to miss out on spoilers. Continue reading “Popcorn Pulse 77: The Last Jed”

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Seasons sure are a thing. A thing which we here are very bad at observing for theme shows. Mostly because of our secret third bost, laziness. The sloth gremlin must be out for the holidays itself because we managed to prepare for this show prior to the cacalendar.

Which brings us to our main feature, Silent Night, Deadly Night 2. While Tim was aware of the film, having seen the first, he’d only known about the sequel via the Garbage Day bit that was viral ages ago. Which you should watch if you aren’t familiar. While Weltall had seen neither the clip nor the first movie that worked out as this movie is comprised of the highlights of the first movie. The rest is chunks of originality thrown into the movie loaf before being half-baked. Continue reading “Popcorn Pulse 76: Christmas Nerd”

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I’ll tell you why I wasn’t at elf practice. Because I dream of larger things. Even larger than the red coated fat man himself. I dream of a world where children will make their own toys and pay us for the privilege. Where curled shoes and pointy ears will be signs of repect amd not ridicule. In order to make that happen I had to skip out on elf practice, Spanky.

For their dual review, Tim and Weltall pick 13 Assassins[2011]. They found out that it happens to be a remake of another Japanese classic. The story centers around the evil brother of the Shogun who is gaining political power. To prevent this dangerous man from ascending to power, thirteen men will attempt to manipulate and maneuver him into a trap. It’s a well done political and tactical thriller that culminates in an amazing action set piece we were highly entertained by. Continue reading “Popcorn Pulse 75: Donut Assassins”

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We’ve talked at length about comic book movies pre-Iron Man and the shared universe phenomenon at least once. There are a lot of relics of that passing age that get to squeak by, buried by the fallout of things like Batman and Robin or Catwoman.

One of the very last of these, before the DC and Marvel juggernauts drowned out most independent comic adaptations, Bulletproof Monk got made. While it may be excellent fodder for an S2S sometime, it definitely warranted some attention from the Popcorn crew. Chow Yun-fat, or “the fat” as Tim calls him for some reason though we don’t have the authority to say its not a thing, stars as the titular monk who isn’t quite bulletproof. More plus one resistance to piercing damage and a dodge action. His pupils is Sean Williams Scott probably best known as Stiffler from American Pie. Continue reading “Popcorn Pulse 74: Diversity Monk”

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One of out favorite movies not to talk about on the show is Highlander. It’s a fun action fantasy movie that has everything. An American with a Swedish accent that’s two seconds away from going bork bork bork. Swordfights with Clancy Brown. Beheadings that don’t make you feel sad and helpless. And the mascot for Scottish separatism playing an Egyptian Spaniard.

Highlander 2 The Quickening is what happens when someone takes the script for the first one and attempts to ruin any goodwill generated. It has weird porcupine henchmen, sex in a dirty alleyway post murder, and Lambert rasping his lines as though he’s auditioning for an anti-smoking PSA.

Weltall then talks about the TV series Chance where Hugh Laurie plays an all too smart doctor. Doctor Not-House ends up with a female patient who pulls him into a world of police corrutpion betrayal. Plus they’ll probably sleep together at some point and that’s the real reason we watch. To if characters will finally cut through the sexual tension and do it already.

Tim then talks briefly about Crossworlds. Let’s see, it’s from the early nineties and has Rutger Hauer in it. Do we really need to mention anything else? It’s the standard bad movie he tries to get everyone else to watch because “no really, it’s so bad its good”. There’s dimensions and crystals and a bit part for Jack Black before he turned into Po.